


Forever The Name

by loudspeakr



Category: Rhett & Link
Genre: Alternate Universe, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Hallucinations, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, POV First Person, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-25
Updated: 2016-06-25
Packaged: 2018-07-18 02:11:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7295365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loudspeakr/pseuds/loudspeakr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rhett struggles with an inner demon he can no longer hold back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forever The Name

**Author's Note:**

> This is my second submission for the Rhink Summer Ficathon 2k16; my prompt was "insomnia", although my interpretation is somewhat loose as you'll find in the ambiguity of this ficlet. The title is from Taylor Swift's "Last Kiss", which has always had a bit of a Rhinky vibe to me with its desperation and poetic longing. 
> 
> I felt like mixing it up and trying something new with this one, so I basically went for the complete opposite of what I usually write: a blunt, depressing first-person ficlet written within the space of less than 24 hours. And so this is what I came up with...
> 
> **Trigger warnings may apply, so proceed with caution!**

Coming back to the world of the living is hard. Joints creak and ache, skin carries a fever my body didn’t ask for. Stomach sits unsteady. I come clawing back, gasping for breath I always had. I’m struggling for something I did not ask to be given.

The room is dark, and I’m grateful. It had unfolded in a bright, sunlit space – the changing of my life – with people scattered everywhere. The soundless gloom is a welcome alteration. Shutting my eyes, though, is like hitting rewind and pressing play, so I keep them open, burning with every needless second of air that touches them.

 _But I see him._ I’ve seen him in every light. I should've known. _His palms are open to me, held outstretched._ His clothes nondescript, hair pushed back the way I like, eyes appraising me over the rim of his glasses. _He beckons for me. Come closer._ It’s an invitation I’ve always said yes to. I had planned on saying yes my entire life. _He’s waiting for me._

“ _But Rhett…_ ”

I halt my advances. His face is still soft, the kindness in his oceanic eyes have never lied to me. The inflection to his voice screaming caution fall on deaf ears. _The corner of his mouth twitches, tilting upwards, parting and blossoming into that smile, a grin._ I’m running.

“ _Rhett, no. We can’t._ ”

He wants to play. I’m the best goddamned player there is.

I reach him, fingertips first. He’s warm under my touch, leaning into it. A gasp so feathery light, I memorise it before I forget. _He rolls his head back, rolls his eyes back, half-lidded._ I trace the valleys of his collarbones, exposed to me. Only me. They dip and wind. I’m drawing the map in my head.

“ _Stop._ ”

Never.

I bless the lump in his throat with the press of my open mouth. I bless the shell of his ear, the tip of his nose, his shoulders, the slope of his belly, each elbow and knee. _Hands still extended towards me, spread palms on my back._ He is ready for me when I reach his hips. He tastes of summer: a low rumbling engine on sticky leather seats, crickets chirping from behind a canvas wall in the dead of night, the splash of the river with shirts off, raw skin burning red.

“ _Don’t do this._ ”

My hair against the coarseness of his is the perfect yin and yang. Light and dark. Day and night. Coexisting, always following, ever-chasing…

“ _Rhett, I choose her_.”

Never catching up.

I listen, I stop. I hit play. _The melody of her laugh, leaning forward across the table._ The air stills in my throat. _Blonde hair splayed on his shoulder._ I try to draw it in, but it catches. _They share a look. Light on dark._ Yin and yang. _Hand outstretched to me, and I see it._ I need to get out. _The glint of her engagement ring._

Waiting for night’s end, the cold clings to me with the ghost of his lips on mine.

 _I need to get out_.

**Author's Note:**

> Uh, I'm sorry...?
> 
> Thanks for reading, and as always, your feedback and kudos are greatly appreciated. 
> 
> <3


End file.
